1. I miss you so much my chest aches and I’m scared that one day I’ll explode & during the autopsy the doctors will find pieces of you tucked inside of my heart and they’ll have to tell my family that I died from a disease that has no cure.
2. I’m sorry for calling right now because I’m a little drunk and a lot sad and I’m sitting in the bathtub trying to scrub the spots where you kissed me clean and I don’t think it’s working so maybe you should come and help.
3. You left your blue sweater under the bed here a couple months ago and I fell asleep wearing it last night but I swear to god I’ll wash it and you can come pick it up whenever you’re not busy. Seeing your face would be nice. Call me back soon.
4. I sent you a photo of a new flavour of oreo at the grocery store because I thought that you would laugh at how stupid a watermelon cookie sounds but it didn’t go through & apparently your account isn’t in use anymore. I guess I’ll resend it in the morning.
5. Your mom came up to me yesterday with cloudy eyes and shaking hands and talked about how nice the weathers been lately. Have you spoken to her recently? I think that she misses you. I sure as hell do.
6. You were in my dream last night and I swear to god I could feel you holding my hand and when I woke up crying I realized how much you mean to me. I might start seeing my counsellor again. You were the only medication I ever needed but now that you’re gone pills don’t sound half that bad.
7. I know that your voicemail is almost full by now but I keep calling and holding my breath as it rings praying that maybe you’ll pick up. I’m not even sure what I would do if you did. Please come back.
8. Your dad called me to tell me that they’re disconnecting your phone because they can’t afford the bill anymore and when your name came up on caller ID I almost puked. I guess this is the last message I’ll leave on here. I hope you get these all eventually. I really do love you.
9. I take back the previous recording, I had to hear your voice one last time.
10. Goodbye, baby. Maybe once your phone stops ringing you’ll be able to rest in peace."
10 voicemails to a dead boy that I loved with all my heart (via u-u-tf)
(Source: u-u-tf, via mphanris)